Have you ever had one of those days when nothing went right? You woke up late, spilled coffee on your shirt and discovered halfway through an important meeting that your kid smeared jam on your shoulder. Someone ate the yogurt you were saving in the office fridge, and you arrived home to find that the dog threw up (again) on your just cleaned Persian rug.

On days like these, we seethe inside, steam at hapless bystanders and take it out on a premium chocolate bar. Sure, the flavonoids in chocolate are a fabulous antioxidant, but when we stop for a moment to step back and assess the damage done, we might inwardly cringe  at how we've mismanaged ourselves.

So, what's the key to keeping our cool when all is in chaos around us? Modern-day spiritual  guide Eckhart Tolle explains that the key is to realize that we are resisting what is. Byron Katie, best-selling self-help author, calls this resistance, "Our arguments with reality." We can't always control what happens in our life, but we do have a choice about how we respond to it.

Both of these modern gurus suggest to first just notice the resistance. To sit with it and not judge it, or label it anything-to just let it be. Then see if you can move at all into accepting whatever it is that is causing your suffering. Personally, I've found this difficult to do, but it is easier when aided by what I affectionately call "The 3-Second Meditation."

Yup, inner calm in three short seconds. Without going into the science behind it, breathing helps steer us away from the fight-or-flight response that gets stirred up when we are highly frustrated. You can do the meditation anywhere, anytime, sitting, standing or waiting in traffic. Here are the five simple steps:

1) Notice the resistance. It might be a mighty "NO!!!" in your head, a clenched fist or a knot in your stomach. Sit with it a moment and attempt to notice it without doing anything about it.

2) Take a deep breath through your nose on a count of "one."

3) Breathe out through your mouth on "two and three." Sometimes making a "whoosh" sound on your out breath helps. (If people are watching, you can give them a big cheesy grin after and say "I'm resetting my neuropsychomotor interface." They'll either sidle away or move in closer, intrigued.)

4) With the out breathe, relax any muscular tension.

5) Repeat as necessary.

Sometimes it takes a few rounds to clear your head and energy of the resistance, and sometimes it just takes one to reset your inner calm button. When we are no longer busy fighting what is, we free up enough mental and psychic energy to deal with the situation
in front of us, and often a creative solution emerges naturally.

For those interested in more advanced breath work, especially for increasing mental clarity  or decreasing anxiety, I highly recommend Integrative Medicine guru, Dr. Andrew Weil's audio series, Breathing: The Master Key to Self Healing (Sounds True, 2000).

The next time chaos threatens to derail your inner calm, notice, lotus, breathe and let go.

Lesley Horton, MD, offers integrated healing as a holistic medical physician, wellness/life coach, medical intuitive counsellor and energy therapist. (604) 767-5655 www.mindbodymedicine.ca

Want to search for other articles that may interest you?

Readers of this article also enjoyed...